National Treasure: Book of Secrets

Otherwise known as National Treasure 2, this big-budget action flick has a mega big-name cast. Returning as intrepid historian / treasure hunter Benjamin Franklin Gates is Nicolas Cage, of course. The supporting cast includes Jon Voight, Ed Harris, Harvey Keitel, and Helen Mirren. Seriously. WHAT THE HELL WAS HELEN MIRREN THINKING?

This is an entertaining movie, a good way to wile away an afternoon, but not a "good" movie or anybody's idea of an Oscar winner. I guarantee you will remember very little about this movie fifteen minutes after you walk out of the theater. This is the movie equivalent of Cool Whip.

Instead of a substantive review, I'll give you a few three-word summaries of this movie.

• Overly white teeth. Seriously, Nic, lay off the tooth whiteners.
• Indiana Jones ripoff.
• Physics rules disregarded.
• Lincoln is assassinated.
• President unusually handsome.
• Lots of chasing.
• Ferrari gets towed.
• Mercedes gets crashed.
• Cibola is golden.
• Lots of water.
• Secret book exists.
• Sidekick hacks computers.
• Silly popcorn movie.

C+